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Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Fuerza de voluntad o, el amor que lo logra todo.

Almorzaba el día de hoy con un amigo neumólogo (especialista en toráx y pulmones), quien en el curso de la degustación, me comentaba:

-" Tengo 58 años y he fumado 02 cajetillas (40 cigarros en total), desde los 15 años. Siempre supe que el cigarrillo era nocivo (inductor de cáncer.-Ver link inferior-), para los pulmones, no obstante yo continuaba fumando. El vicio era más fuerte. Más tarde me casé y tuve mi primera hija, a los 36 años. Intuyendo que iba a ser la única, empecé a quererla entrañablemente, desde el primer minuto de su vida".
" Empero, yo continuaba fumando. Un dia cuando ella tenía 1 més de nacida, noté que tosía constantemente, lo cual me extrañó, en tanto yo extremaba cuidados, para mantenerla sana. Raudo, ingresé en el cuarto cerrado (para evitar resfrios). Lo que ví, me consternó profundamente. En el ángulo derecho estaba mi nena, casi morada tosiendo y con enormes dificultades para respirar. Del cenicero, ubicado en la parte inferior izquierda, muy cerca de la cuna, se elevaba verticalmente una columna ondulante de humo blanco, conformando interminables volutas circulares. En su ascenso, el humo rozaba la nariz de mi bebe. Comprendí entonces que mi hija sin desearlo también estaba fumando en forma pasiva. La escena debía haberse iniciado por lo menos 40 minutos antes. Yo había estado en el cuarto, un poco antes, habiendo dejado el humeante cigarrillo, ahí, aunque no recordaba el hecho. Me sentí culpable. Lloré desconsoladamente. Entonces, le prometí a mi hija y a mí mismo, no fumar más".
"Al día siguiente, al enterarse mi mujer de mi decisión me dijo : -que va a ser, tu vás a seguir fumando. Además ya has prometido dejar de fumar, muchas veces-" "Yo le dije, que esta véz, las cosas eran definitvas. En efecto dejé el cigarrillo. Sufrí los 3 primeros meses y cuando las tentaciones arreciaban me acordaba de la tós de mi hija, desistiendo de inmediato. 05 años después, en una reunión de amigos, alguien insistía invitándome un cigarrillo. Acabé cediendo ante tanta súplica. Apenas había empezado a fumar, aparecieron de improviso mi esposa y mi hija. No se que ocurrió, pero desde que ví a mi hija, tuve asco y rechazé inconscientemente al cigarrillo, al mismo que descarté de inmediato. No volvi a fumar, desde entonces. Desde entonces también y por razones de mi especialidad he visto morir a tanta gente a causa del cigarillo, muchos de ellos con cáncer de pulmón".
Porque fumabas?

"Al principio, por imitación, tú sabes, los hombres fuman. Más con el tiempo me percaté que fumaba para calmar mi ansiedad. Acostumbraba fumar fuera de mi casa, a las 2 de la mañana. En mis buenos tiempos antes de dormir solia leer acompañado de un cigarrillo, el último del dia".
A que atribuyes haber dejado de fumar ?
"A mi fuerza de voluntad. Por eso me rio, cuando un drogadicto dice que no puede dejar el vicio.Todo esta en el cerebro. Yo me decidi y venci".

Puede ser, aunque personalmente pienso que el amor a su hija, fué el factor más importante en su actitud. Como profesional, alterno semanalmente, con jóvenes drogadictos, delincuentes y otros outsiders. Todos, me dicen lo mismo : "Doctor, sí mis padres me hubiesen dado amor, yo no sería lo que soy". es cierto, bastaba con un poco de amor dado o, recibido, tan solo eso.
Links:
Force of will or, the love that obtains everything.

I had lunch today with a lung specialist friend (specialist in toráx and lungs), who in the course of the tasting commented to me:
- "I am 58 years old and I have smoked 02 small boxes (40 cigarettes altogether), since the 15 years. I always knew that the cigarette was injurious (inductive of Cancer.-See inferior Link -), for the lungs, despite it I continued smoking. The vice was stronger. Later I married and I had my first daughter, to the 36 years. Intuiting that it was going to be the unique one, I began to closely love her, from the first minute of its life ".
"However, I continued smoking. A day when she had 1 month of been born, I noticed that she coughed constantly, which was strange to me, in as much I carried far cares, to maintain she in good health. Fast I entered to the closed quarter (to avoid common cold). What I saw affected me deeply. In the right angle was my baby, almost mulberry coughing and with enormous difficulties to breathe. Of the ash tray, located in the left inferior part, closely together of the cradle, a waving column of white smoke rose vertically, conforming interminable circular scrolls. In its ascent, the smoke cleared the nose of my baby. Then I understood that my daughter without wishing also was smoking it in passive form. The scene must have initiated at least 40 minutes before. I had been in the quarter, a little before, having left the smoky cigarette, there, although the fact did not remember. I felt like culprit. I cried very heartbrokenly. Then, I promised to my daughter and to me, not to smoke more ".
"On the following day, when finding out my woman my decision said to me: - that she is going to be, you will be surely continue smoking. In addition already you have promised to let smoke, often - "" I said to him, that this time was the last. In effect I left the cigarette. I underwent the 3 first months and when the temptations got worse I remembered my daughter coughing, stopping immediately. 05 years later, on a meeting of friends, somebody insisted inviting a cigarette to me. I ended up yielding before as much plea. Hardly I had begun to smoke, then appeared unexpectedly my wife and my daughter. Not that it happened, but once I saw my daughter, I unconsciously had distaste to the cigarette, and I discarded it immediately. I decided again not to smoke, since then. Since then also and for reasons of my specialty I have seen die to as much people because of cigarette, many of them with lung cancer ".
Why you smoked?
"At the beginning, by imitation, you know, the men smoke. More with time I noticed that smoking calm my anxiety. I was used to smoking outside my house, at 2 a.m. in the morning. In my good times before sleeping I used to read accompanied of a cigarette, the last one of the day ".
To what resons you attribute to have let smoke?
"To my force of will. For that reason I laugh, when a drug addict says that he cannot leave the vice. All is in the brain. I decided myself and won ".
It can be, although personally I think that the love to its daughter, was the most important factor in its attitude. Like professional, alternating weekly, with young drug addicts, delinquents and others outsiders, all, say to me the same: "Doctor, if my parents had given me only a piece of love, I would not be what I am".
That's true. It is enough with only a little love given or, received. So single that.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Eso del amor es lo que Viktor Frankl llamo "sentido". El dichoso amigo se dio cuenta que el sentido de su vida, su hija, era atacado por el mismo... y así el sentido-amor del hombre nuevamente demostro que el Amor es la fuerza más poderosa dentro de lo conocido y tal vez tambien dentro de lo que no conocemos, pero sabemos que actua, actuó y actuará

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Blogger victormechanmendez said...

Si me lo permites precisaré mi concepto del amor, para este caso. Aunque es casi repitiendo lo escrito en Corintios I:"el amor no pide nada, se dá simplemente, es humilde,todo lo sufre,todo lo soporta, nada espera, nada reclama" "si tienes ciencia y careces de amor nada eres, si tienes el poder de la profecia y no tienes amor nada eres, si hablas lenguas extrañas y no tienes amor, nada eres" "Cuando solo tienes ciencia ves la verdad como reflejada en un espejo, a medias. Si tienes amor verás (sentirás), la esencia misma de las cosas".

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